IN OUR SOCIETY, A MAN’S SEXUAL PROWESS IS OFTEN MEASURED by his ability to get an erection and by how long it takes him, post-ejaculation, to get hard again. If you’re a teenager it may just be a matter of minutes before you’re ready for the next round, but if you’re a senior citizen it can be a day or more. Either way, the basic architecture is the same—you peak, you tumble off the cliff, and it’s no more hard wood for a while.
Men understandably interpret this to mean they’ve got “pause-till-furthernotice” stamped on their penis. The entire sex act becomes shaped by this awareness and sex becomes an exercise in ejaculation management. This can be quite a distraction. If you’re focused on your fear of not being able to recover an erection, that much less of you is available to open to a loving connection and pleasure.
Many men develop excellent ejaculatory control, but even when it’s not an issue, they’re still managing their tumble off the cliff. There’s another option. You can have all the pleasure of orgasm without ejaculation and its subsequent pause, called the “refractory period” by sexologists. Orgasm and ejaculation are physiologically separate processes. You can have an orgasm and bypass ejaculation entirely by internally recycling your semen.
Using the approach of the ancient Daoist (Taoist) masters, I’ve been practicing non-ejaculatory orgasm in this manner for more than three decades and I’ve taught thousands of men how to do this. It’s quite simple if you’re willing to open your mind to the Daoist energetic perspective on how the body operates. Learn how to boost your low sperm count.
When you cultivate non-ejaculatory orgasm, you get that looming refractory period out of your head and your sex life. You can enjoy the male equivalent of female extended orgasms, with the pleasure lasting minutes, even hours and days. This is full-on, whole-body orgasmic pleasure, not some pale shadow. Bypassing the emission of semen doesn’t remove the deepest pleasure of orgasm.
For the man who’s mastered non-ejaculatory orgasm, there’s no more worry about a post-squirting collapse. You are completely free to play energetically with your lover and are able to sustain an erection longer because you’re not triggering erectile collapse with a full ejaculation.
The Physiology of Orgasm
Sperm are stored in the epididymis, which is located in the testicles. At any given moment, hundreds of millions of those little fellas live there, ready to emerge in a single ejaculation. When they’re in a passive, unaroused state, they just relax and float around like they’re in a spa. It’s warm and liquid in there—things are, like, mellow, dude! When you see a sexy person or start having a sexual fantasy, suddenly that laid-back spa turns into a disco. All those sperm start dancing around in a frenzy and it gets really crowded and hot. If it turns into full-on sex, before long the sperm are going, “There isn’t room for all 500 million of us in this disco.”
Inevitably, the energy reaches a bursting point and those sperm head for the exit. In your standard ejaculatory orgasm, they’re shot up a tube called the vas deferens to the prostate, which adds a clear liquid called prostatic fluid to the sperm. This liquid, also known as pre-cum, contains nutrients that give them strength and energy as they head off on their epic longshot journey through the urethra, out the penis and up the vaginal canal through the uterus and into the Fallopian tubes to the Promised Land of Egg.*
It’s as if the prostate is handing them a little lunchbox. Thanks, Mom! And off they go on their way.
The first part of the male ejaculatory process is testicular. It sends sperm up the vas deferens. The second is prostatic and it sends those little swimmers out the penis. When you practice non-ejaculatory orgasm, you allow the testicular pulsation to happen, but not the prostatic pulsation. You re-route the sexual energy so it moves up and inside your body instead of out the penis.
The physical sperm, once emptied of their essence (called jing qi by Daoists), are absorbed back into the bloodstream from the testicles, vas deferens, prostate and bladder. Their valuable minerals and proteins are recycled and put to good use by the blood.
Health and Non-Ejaculatory Orgasm
If you’re choosing to orgasm without ejaculating, it’s very important for health reasons to move the energy up inside the body rather than leave it to stagnate in the genito-urinary tract. I’ve seen research studies which suggest that men who practice conventional celibacy have a higher rate of prostate cancer than other men. While the findings are far from conclusive, if true, this is probably because their sexual energy gets trapped in their prostate. According to Chinese medicine, stagnant energy is what creates tumors. If they were practicing non-ejaculatory orgasm, they’d be moving the energy, it wouldn’t be stagnant and their rates of prostate cancer would likely decline.
One Daoist practice for keeping men from ejaculating is to have them or their partner press firmly on the Million Dollar Spot, located on the man’s perineum. When you press this, you’re compressing the vas deferens. It’s an effective way to keep sperm from moving into the prostate and losing your jing qi.
But after years of working with Daoist sexology, this is one of their few practices I’ve disavowed because it creates congestion. You’re trapping those 500 million disco dancers in the testicles, which may cause ‘blue balls,’ and that’s not healthy. You want that energy to move. You don’t want it dammed up.
We all know how powerful sexual energy is. When you circulate it through your body instead of sending it out your penis, it’s like you’re super-charging yourself with a dose of the best nutrients ever. I’m in my mid-sixties and have been practicing non-ejaculatory orgasm for well over three decades. During that time, I’ve had only a few ejaculatory orgasms. I have no gray hair and people tell me I have the energy of a man in my forties. While this is only my subjective experience, I attribute this largely to conservation of my sexual seed. I’ve had amazing sex and I recently made a baby with my new wife, who’s in her twenties. We waited till her fertile time, I elected to have an ejaculatory orgasm, and we succeeded on our first try.
I believe this method of internally recycling sexual energy supercharges your sperm when you do finally release it, producing extraordinarily healthy children. While one case isn’t scientific proof, in a world where so many people face fertility challenges and where guys in their 60s tend to have less peppy sperm than younger men, I am living testimony to the health and vitality benefits of practicing non-ejaculatory orgasm. It certainly doesn’t inhibit fertility, and I’ve been enjoying high-energy ‘spiritual’ orgasms for decades!
Let me emphasize that I made a strong commitment to 100% non-ejaculatory orgasm. Practice makes perfect. Nothing requires you to do the same. How much you practice non-ejaculatory orgasm is entirely up to you. You can do it as much or as little as you like. Even doing it half the time you make love or masturbate will provide major health and spiritual benefits.
If you want to practice non-ejaculatory orgasm, you’ll need to put effort into developing the ability. It’s not difficult to learn, but you can’t get it by snapping your fingers, either. How long it takes to master non-ejaculatory orgasm varies from person to person. Factors include the emotional and physical blocks you’re carrying in your body and how long they’ve been there, and your comfort level with the Daoist energy model. Some men pick it up quickly, others more slowly—but I know from long experience that any man can learn it.